Domestic violence is one of the nation’s best kept secrets. Myths and misunderstandings abound.
Knowing the facts is an important step toward breaking the cycle of violence.
- Fact: Almost 4 million women are beaten in their homes every year by their male partners. Although the first violent incident may not be severe, once battering begins, it tends to increase in severity and frequency, sometimes leading to permanent injury or death. What may begin as an occasional slap or shove will turn into a push down the stairs, a punch in the face, or a kick in the stomach.
- Fact: Battering is not about anger or losing control; it is an intentional choice focused on maintaining power and control in the relationship. Batterers manage not to beat their bosses or terrorize their friends when they are angry. Batterers function quite normally in public.
- Fact: The batterer is responsible for the violence – not the victim. People are beaten for breaking an egg yolk while fixing breakfast, for wearing their hair a certain way, for dressing too nicely or not nice enough, for cooking the wrong meal, or any other number of excuses. These incidents do not warrant or provoke violence. Even when you disagree, you do not deserve to be beaten. People who are battered do not want to be beaten.